narrow is the path

So, I'm here at Grace College! FINALLLLY!!!!!

It was quite the journey this summer. And I've had quite the journey of life really! But I came to this place knowing no one with a goal to learn as much about God as I could so I could equip myself to GO and GLORIFY GOD with my life. And the call God has placed on my life is to travel to a foreign country and meet their needs, by teaching language and by loving with my whole heart and I have no idea what else! Whatever God's Will is for that day. And just this week, I have felt so many new aspects of Christ. So many new challenges laid on my heart. So much uncomfort, which has caused me to rely on Him more than I have in a long time.

I knew I idealized college way to much by probably the first night. It wasn't cotton candy and rainbows, it wasn't perfect on any level, it wasn't full of all loving, Jesus-driven Christians everywhere I turned like I had hoped. And I knew that it wouldn't be that, but I still had some pretty unhealthy expectations. Since I've been here I've met some VERY awesome Jesus-loving people, I'm not saying that they aren't amazing...because they so are! But I just idealized everything too much. You know? I've been surprised at the lack of openness here. I've been surprised at the lack of friendliness. I've been surprised at the lack of seeking God at all times. I think I felt like coming to a Christian college, everyone was going to be perfect. And that I'd just grow immensely and meet so many cool people with such perfect little God-filled hearts. But I don't even know, it's been different.

And so, at first I was like "oh no, I made a mistake!" but God was just like SCREAMING at me "just wait. chill. I will reveal it to you." So, I chilled. And this sunday, I visited this little church with two of my hallmates called New Horizon. There the pastor gave an awesome sermon on the closing Sermon on the Mount.

“You can enter God’s Kingdom only through the narrow gate. The highway to hell is broad, and its gate is wide for the many who choose that way. But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it."

Matthew 7:13&14

God just said to me at that moment.... The gate is still narrow. The path is still rough. Christian college doesn't fix that. And yeah, you're uncomfortable there because it's new. That's a part of the plan. You're in my plan, stop doubting it. I have SUCH a plan for your life, and you've just got to keep obeying me. I love you.

And we sang Come Thou Fount.

"Here I raise my Ebenezer
Hither by Thy help I've come
And I hope by Thy good pleasure
Safely to arrive at Home"

And I just felt this overwhelming sense of peace. Like God had taken me this far, and the rest of my life is a tribute to His good works in my life. And with that, and service, I will serve Him til I die.

I have every intention of glorifying Him everyday. And I think that I came into this next chapter with the attitude that it would be easy, and wouldn't require any work. But I can tell you, I've met a lot of people that don't want to be here at this college. That still aren't too sure about Jesus. And in this chapter, even though it's comfortable in the fact that I AM LEARNING IN CLASSROOMS about Jesus <3<3<3 It's very uncomfortable people-wise. And you know what? That's my skill-set. People. And I'm finally feeling my purpose for here and now. To do what I've done the past 18 years of my life: To wake up, put on the full armor of God, and go into battle. Because even though this campus is filled with Christ, satan is still on the prowl. And Jesus is calling me to a life loving Him and loving others.

I'm not done. I'm a stupid human who doesn't get it. I need Jesus. Others need Jesus. Others need me. I'm going to learn a lot. This wasn't what I expected, but it never is. It's never suppose to be. Because otherwise, where's the FAITH? Narrow is the path, even here. Thank You for Your enlightenment God. Thank You for Your Glory.

I think this is the most disorganized blog yet, I'm sorry for rambling so much.