earnest love

Now, I consider love one of my strengths in being a Christ-like. But one of the passages I read last week really made me do a double-take on how I love others.

I am definitely a people person. I like to be around people. I rarely get tired of people. I like to listen to people and to talk to people and to be near people. I like to give to people and to receive from people. I just...love people! And in my life, I've had to learn the hard way that not everyone will love me back as much or even quite in the same way that I love them. And I've had to learn the hard way that sometimes "treat everyone the way you want to be treated" (matthew 7:12) won't always be flowers and hearts and candy. Because not everyone wants to be loved the way I would want to be loved. But am I suppose to give people what they want? Isn't that a big part of love? And I've had to learn the hard way how vulnerable love makes you. Because when people are sure that you love them, then they don't really have to respect you, because they trust that your love is unconditional and that you'll continue to love them even if they treat you badly, or take advantage of you, or are mean to you.

And so, yeah, I guess I've got a big chip on my shoulder about love these days. Because I've put up with it all! I've turned the other cheek, I've continued to treat others the way I wish they'd treat me, I've loved the unlovable and unlovely, I've even loved those who I know don't love me back, but when it comes right down to it, I don't quite think I've always done it for the right reasons.

I mean, it's great that I'm a natural lover. It's great that God's given me the gift of compassion and kindness and the strength to endure all the abuse I've just taken throughout my life. But do I love out of good intentions? Do I love because it's God's Will? Do I love because that's the way I want to be treated? I guess the answer is only sometimes, because sometimes I love out of spite. Sometimes I love because it's my will. Sometimes I love because I expect something back.

God loves me with the best intentions. He loves me because He is the best thing for me. He loves me because of His good grace, because I don't treat Him the way He treats me. And sure, God wants something in return, but He doesn't require it, He doesn't do it because of what He'll get back. He does it out of love. Out of true, pure, earnest love.

Therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. As obedient children, do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, since it is written, “You shall be holy, for I am holy.” And if you call on him as Father who judges impartially according to each one's deeds, conduct yourselves with fear throughout the time of your exile, knowing that you were ransomed from the futile ways inherited from your forefathers, not with perishable things such as silver or gold, but with the precious blood of Christ, like that of a lamb without blemish or spot. He was foreknown before the foundation of the world but was made manifest in the last times for the sake of you who through him are believers in God, who raised him from the dead and gave him glory, so that your faith and hope are in God. Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart.
1 peter 1:13-22 (ESV)

I mean, man! Do I really live that? And I can tell myself over and over again, "It's not fair". And it's not! But it wasn't fair for God first. And if I call myself a Christian, a Christ follower, with my goal to be like Christ in everything I do, then I want it to be not fair for me second.

It's a tough road. And it just keeps getting tougher everyday. The phrase "love earnestly" has echoed around in my mind for the entire past week...earnestly: serious in intention, purpose, or effort; sincerely zealous what a calling! What a seriously hard calling. I still can't even wrap my mind around it, nonetheless begin to live it. But I'll keep striving for it. Because Christ lived it first, He calls me to it, and He'll never give up on shaping my heart. Wow. Just, wow.